Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize