Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.

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  (313): Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone. http://tfl.nu/vfbd
  Replies (40) Good night (13996) Bad night (1399) Order T-Shirt
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.

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  (734): Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work. http://tfl.nu/ms2h
  Replies (12) Good night (471) Bad night (2013) Order T-Shirt
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.

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  (321): I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment. http://tfl.nu/8o3c
  Replies (18) Good night (3103) Bad night (518) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.

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  (440): last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired. http://tfl.nu/up5u
  Replies (14) Good night (636) Bad night (3616) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks

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  (610): dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks http://tfl.nu/8rbl
  Replies (20) Good night (1961) Bad night (3520) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine

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  (+44): The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine http://tfl.nu/6flp
  Replies (12) Good night (979) Bad night (3620) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.

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  (508): she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms. http://tfl.nu/mjwo
  Replies (6) Good night (934) Bad night (1832) Order T-Shirt
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  (239): View more from Florida

  I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.

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  (239): I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore. http://tfl.nu/vgm4
  Replies (7) Good night (1686) Bad night (667) Order T-Shirt
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.

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  (803): could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning. http://tfl.nu/cs20
  Replies (2) Good night (1128) Bad night (502) Order T-Shirt
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life

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  (214): Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life http://tfl.nu/rhcn
  Replies (3) Good night (443) Bad night (1414)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.

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  (573): So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs. http://tfl.nu/477y
  Replies (12) Good night (2403) Bad night (459)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it

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  (630): I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it http://tfl.nu/s57c
  Replies (5) Good night (471) Bad night (1518) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.

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  (410): I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it. http://tfl.nu/7121
  Replies (9) Good night (428) Bad night (750) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love

  (1-860): View more from Connecticut

  I remember it like it was tomorrow.

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  (860): Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love (1-860): I remember it like it was tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/1n7o
  Replies (2) Good night (2042) Bad night (348) Order T-Shirt
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  (619): View more from California

  Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich

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  (619): Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich http://tfl.nu/84vp
  Replies (5) Good night (643) Bad night (188) Order T-Shirt

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