Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize