get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize