no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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