so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
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drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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