Your dad touched me again.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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