when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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