Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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