just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
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