The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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