You really coming over, don't trick.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize