I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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