sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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