I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
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He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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