can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize