oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
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how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
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