woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Randomize