I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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