this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize