How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Randomize