gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize