I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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