every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
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