that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize