Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize