listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize