why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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