Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize