My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize