So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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