you turned your livingroom into a bong?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
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I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
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a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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