Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
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