I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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