I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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