I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy sore nipples Batman
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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