we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
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