oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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