i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
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