All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
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