i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
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