I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
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