And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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