Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize