is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Floor bacon is actually really good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize