Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize