my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize