I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I deserve to be covered in dicks
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
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