ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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