i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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